TEACHER'S TALE: My Two Cents on Passion

I have always admired people who obviously does things not for money or fame or popularity. I have seen a lot. But this is not about passionate people, but about the opposite. We always talk about passionate people, what they do and how they are with whatever passion they have, but we rarely read articles about im-passionate people. If that's the right word?

And so I wondered. For the longest time, I consider myself a very passionate person. Passionate about teaching, about things I love to do like reading, make ups, and taking care of my family. But I guess not everyone has "passion" or I think they don't. The question now is, why do people become these kinds of people? How do we identify these kinds of people? How do we prevent from becoming one? Or stay away from them? 

I have seen and dealt with these types of people.

People who you would think works only for the sake of money because they want to have so much in life they do things even if they don't want to. This usually results to suffering maybe of themselves or unfortunately of other people.These are people who keep a record of what they have done for you or for the company or for whoever. People who are selfish and would take advantage of other people, all for their own benefit. 

Physically, these people look unpleasant, not that they are ugly or anything. Its just there is something in them that you can really pinpoint, that looks or better yet feels unpleasant. They walk around with a frown, reacts negatively, and their body language shows defensiveness. They don't consider other people's time, and go to meetings or classes late without valid excuses or without remorse. They are nice only to people who they think can be of help to them. In reality I think,they are afraid of competition, but disguises this fear with strength.I think people like these are wrongly motivated. Or they choose to be this way.  

This is where the challenge comes in. If passionate people can be influential, no doubt being impassionate as well.  So you get to choose, would you rather have the fire and let it burn or just a candle looking for a flame? For me, I would try my hardest to keep the fire burning even if I am surrounded by these kinds of people. It is by choice that a person becomes passionate, just like being happy. If you are happy with what you do regardless of any monetary reward or recognition, hold on to that and continue doing it. That is your FIRE. Like a real fire, it needs protection. Protection from air, water, and people who would try to put the flame out. Don't let them. Hold on and fight for the flame. If at the moment you are on the verge of putting out your own flame, step back and think. Recall what was good about you, what makes you smile, what keeps you alive, then maybe, just maybe, this would be enough to rekindle the flame. If you have that "impassionate" person in your life, stay guarded, make sure you are focused on your passion. You cannot let anyone overshadow what we love to do. It is your ow fire and you have to keep it safe. If that person, is your friend, family, relative or anyone close to you, what we can only do is to try and rub them with our flame, in that they find their own. 

If we are truly passionate people, we do not stop because we are already passionate as an individual. What we do should always be to try and make other people feel passionate as well. Through our actions, behavior, words, and especially thoughts. You cannot fake passion, if it isn't true, just like any flame it will die. 

Passion drives a person to a direction one chooses to go. Without it, everything would seem to feel like a routine, boring, and a senseless existence.

I challenge you, keep the fire burning. Spread like wild fire!:)

TEACHER'S TALE: Scholarship Grants in De La Salle - College of Saint Benilde

If you're looking for a scholarship in college, apply at De La Salle - College of Saint Benilde by clicking the link below. Benildean Excellence in Scholastics and Talents (BEST) Scholarship.

There are still other options for the scholarship aside from BEST scholarship or outstanding academis performances ranging from artist, athlete, Benildean Hope scholars, etc.

Check it out on the site and start doing ordinary things extraordinarily well.:) 

TEACHER'S TALE: Things I Learned from Teaching

I am a teacher.

I have been for the last 7 years of my life. 

But this is the first time that I am not. 

I was not terminated nor did I quit the job, its just that I have been given a wonderful blessing that I needed to carry for nine months. 

I am missing teaching but I am looking forward. 

This "I-Miss-Teaching" feeling has got me reflecting in my experiences as a teacher.m For the past years, I have never been able to fully contemplate on what it means to be a teacher. This spare time I had gave me that opportunity. Its very timely, as well, that I write on the lessons I learned from being a teacher. 

My Lessons Learned 

• You have to be yourself.. but not so much. This is one of the important lessons I have learned in my years of teaching. It was only during the time I felt comfortable in my own skin in class that I felt my students accepted me and the lessons more. I remember the first time I taught in class, I was so cautious not to show my students my humorous side. I thought I needed to be very strict, does not crack jokes, and would always mean business when in class. But then when there are moment I let my real self to slip out, I felt a lot happier, a lot easier to talk to my students and convey the message I want to them. Although, I am myself in my class, I still put boundaries especially on my personal life. I would rather keep everything on the surface and not to disclose too much about myself. I think its also one way of preserving myself and putting a limitation on our relationship as teacher and student.

• You cannot force your students to understand or even listen to you. I think this is one of the basic lessons a teacher should know about teaching. Not everyone's going to listen and be interested in the lessons.Even the best students sometimes have moments they don't really care about the lesson (but would not let you know how they felt.:)) It gets frustrating, I understand that, but that's just how it is. There are moments we cannot force our students to get what we say or to take importance in the lesson. That is why, we are teachers, its because its our duty to make them interested and to make them care.  

• You have to give compliments and also criticisms. This has actually worked for me for many time s already. Every time I encounter students who seems to not care about the class or their studies as a whole I would tend to talk to them and help them recognize their goodness. I would look into their potentials and highlight to them, straight to their face. I don't just write it on their works but I make sure I tell them their positive traits personally. Most of the time, it works for them, and it works for me. A word of caution, we give compliments to those who deserve it and give criticisms to those who need it. There are also students who feel entitled that they forget their limitations. That is the reason why I think it is important that we also point out areas of improvement to our students. 

• You have to get to know your students. I have this conviction that it is essential and useful to also get to know our students. Its surprising that most students would feel proud and happy if their teacher knows their name. It's really very basic but it goes a long way. Why did I say that? Its because knowing a person's name is a recognition of their existence. That the teacher took the time to remember their names which means they are valued. Aside from that, its easier to get their attention in class if we know their names. ;)

• You can only try to bring your advocacy in class but can never impose them. In the same way that we cannot force our students to listen to us, we cannot also force them to acquire the advocacy that we carry as individuals. Keeping in mind that people have different issues and backgrounds which means there are things a person would want to carry with them or not. I also think that the present generation is too caught up and distracted with individual growth that they forget to care for other important things. This is the part that is very challenging for teachers, as we need to find a way to make them stand up for something. But if it means standing up or prioritizing something other that what we carry, then we should not be disappointed. The important thing is that they took a stand.

• You have to put values in everything. When I say everything, I mean everything. From the way we dress up to making decisions in class. The way we carry ourselves in class is a simple manifestation of how we value not only ourselves, but also our students. The time we take in preparing the way we look in class only shows we took also took the time for our students to see a pleasant view while studying. We all became students and we know how it feels to attend a class we didn't really like and to make matters worst to have an unpleasant looking teacher. Taking care of ourselves means we value who we are and our selves. As teachers, it's also important to make sure we base our decisions on what we value most. What is important for us. In example, do we scold our students just to show them who the boss is, or do we scold them out of love?   

• You don't have to please your students. One of the lessons I had the longest time to overcome. I started teaching in 2006 when I was still 21 years old and fresh out of college. I was really shy during college and I carried that when I started teaching. That's the main reason, I would often give my first batch of students what they want. I'd say they were lucky because they had free time and early dismissal every time they would ask for it because I wanted to please them. But, come to think of it, I think they were more unlucky than lucky. Because I wanted to please them, I gave them temporary happiness but not long term lessons. I would say I rob them of the time they could have spent learning.  Fortunately, I learned to not care too much if I do not please them as long as I know that they will get something out of the discussion or activity in class. I have learned to accept that students will reject me at times and dislike me, but that's normal. I am not a teacher because I want to please instead a teacher who wants to teach, whether they like it or not.

• Your excellence should extend even outside the classroom. Excellence is a way of life. It is not something we pretend to do when somebody is watching, or if there is a promotion awaiting us. Excellence means coming to class on time, bringing materials needed, preparing the lesson ahead of time, attending class even when you feel sickly, and maximizng the time spent in teaching. These are things we do in class but it does not stop there. Even outside of class there are responsibilities of excellence such as grades management, consultation hours, preparation of new lessons, keeping updated by trends, and checking paper. Being a teacher does not stop when we step outside the classrooms, it does not stop when our students are not looking. Being a teacher requires that we always keep in mind that WE ARE TEACHERS. That in anything we do, we make sure we give it our best. It means we extend ourselves outside the job descriptions that are given to us. 

• You have to be passionate. In all there is to being a teacher, it is PASSION that makes a teacher a great one. Passion as a teacher for me means looking and working beyond the compensation. It also means not complaining if we need to extend the time we spend in school for preparing and checking papers. Passion is reading and re-reading papers that we cannot really understand. It means learning and sharing what we have learned with zeal and joy. We give a part of ourselves, our income, our talents and time because that is how much we love teaching. That is how much we love our students. 

You see, teachers also learn inside the classroom. Sometimes its even more than what teachers teach their students. Students are also one of the best teachers anyone can have. They teach not only time and classroom management, not just simply patience, not just holding one's template but they teach life lessons. Its only a matter of how we, as teachers, take what is given to us, what is in front of us. Every student is a lesson waiting to be learned, a book waiting to be read, and a person waiting to be understood. 

I am a teacher. I am a student. 

TEACHER'S TALE:Of Certain Truths and Uncertainties

its eleven in the evening and i just finished checking exam papers of my students. i finished really fast and nto considering the grades my student got, i felt sad. hence, this blog.
there are truths and uncertainties that have been lingering in my mind for almost six months now. it started early part of the month, january to be exact. the day i knew i had to face truths and uncertainties.

truth #1. i only have two months and im gone.

ive talked about this truth to so many people too many times. to the point that i bored myself thinking and talking about it. this is my last term of teaching and though i knew of it six months ago, it still doesnt feel right.

truth #2. i have accepted but not without pain.

for the first few months that i ve learned of truth #1, all i felt was pain. pain of losing the one thing i loved doing. pain of not being able to be with the people i have grown with. people i learned a lot from. People who have accepted me, inside and out. People i have considered family.
i also felt pain that i would not be able to teach students again in CSB. the pain that just at the time that i knew i meant something to some students is the time i have to go.
Pain knowing this was all my fault.
i have accepted but it is just too painful.

Truth #3. i am scared.

for the past months, i have not been able to fully admit to myself that i am scared.
scared that i might not be able to accomplish the last task i need to do.
scared that i might not find a job thats both enjoyable and fulfilling.
scared that i might not meet people as fun as the people i have now.
scared that i might be too old.
scared that all the plans i have for the next months may not come thru at all.

i have been face with these truths but more overwhelming are the uncertainties. I have no idea what my future holds for me. I worry myself for most of the nights im alone that i experience dreaming about zombies caused by stress. for 6 years i have never faced this enormous uncertainty in my life up until now.

Uncertainty #1. Where will i be after August.
ive been planning. plans always bring uncertainties.
what if these plans fail me, how do i pick myself up again? How do i tell people? What do i tell them? more than the uncertain plans, what worries me more is my embarrassment.

Disclaimer: dont confuse this to my being coward or mahina ang loob. what i feel now is different.
 
uncertainty #2. will i ever finish?
Will I finish, will i even be able to stand up again and pick where i left of in my studies? How do i deal with it now that i dont have the support group i had in the first part?
If i do finish, where will it lead me?

Uncertainty #3: What does this mean? IS there any reason or purpose for this happening in my life?
I have always believe in purpose. that somewhere in this universe someone has a big plan for me. That this is all part of the plan. I believe that all things happen because it is meant to happen.
But this time, i cannot fully put my trust on this belief. Is this really where im supposed to be, to leave the job i am passionate about, to leave the people i love so much, to be alone?


Until August, I am the same person 6 years ago. A teacher.



after that i am lost.

TEACHER'S TALE: Titser titseran!

Mga natitirang araw ko sa pagiging titser. Nabibilang man ang araw na gagawin ko ang isa sa mga pinakamasaya ako, nagpapasalamt ako sa mga panahon na andito ako. Mamimiss ko ang bawag estudyante, mga papel, mga kasama sa trabaho, bakasyon engrande, ang pagkakataong makapagturo sa mga kabataang magiging kinabukasan ng bayan. Anut anuman, umalis man ako, habambuhay akong isang guro.

TEACHER'S TALE:ERRATUM: The Green Project 7

I changed the title of my previous post into 

The Green Project 7 

instead of The Green Project 74.

Why the change?

Well... I realized 74 days is too much to carry for my students and it seems unrealistic as I know how busy my students are with studies, or work, or just plain living their lives. So there, 74 changed to 7 meaning the number of weeks before our final grading. Most of my students already submitted their works, so far Im okay with what they did. Some even surprised me with their works:)

This is gonna be exciting:)

TEACHER'S TALE: IDEA: Green Project 74

While drinking coffee, checking students' papers, facebooking and texting. A seemingly great idea came to mind.   GREEN PROJECT 74 Its actually not a personal project but a project for my students this term. Im teaching a "College 101" course this term, and I find it irrelevant to give written exams. WHY? well, first I dont think I can assess their learning in class through multiple choices or essay exams. So, it came to this,  

 THE GREEN PROJECT 74

So what is it? The title is actually a code. 

GREEN: La Salle and Benilde color

PROJECT: As it is a requirement in the subject 

74: Days till course card day

 Instructions: Its really simple. For the next 74 days starting tomorrow my students would make their own blog but with the same title The Green Project 74 by (insert name of student). Their blog will consist of different experiences they would have in CSB. (Just a little background: Most of my students are transferees from other schools, in their 2nd degrees, returning students, etc.. Most of them are also ARTS STUDENTS. Which makes this idea a lot exciting.) So anyway, for each week I will give them specific themes that they would have to incorporate in their blogs. I would require minimum of 2 blog entries for the week. They could include pictures, essays, poems, or anything they would want to include as long as it would show their experience with the school and answer the given theme of the week. 

This is really exciting for me and I hope my students would like it too:)

TEACHER'S TALE:Five.

Naive.

Passion

Acceptance

Discoveries

Changes. 

TEACHER'S TALE:101 Things to do in my Lifetime

Dahil sa panahon na naman ng pagchecheck ng papel ng mga estudyante ko eh, eto at nainspire din akong gawin ang pina-assignment ko sakanila. Para patas naman at maintindihan ko din kung anong hirap o saya ang dinaranas nila habang ginagawa ang assignment nato.:) Goal and goal setting kasi ang usapin namen sa klase so naisip kong ipalista sa kanila ang tulad sa bucket list na movie, kung saan isinulat ng dalawang magkaibigan ang mga gusto nilang gawin sa buhay at ito naman ay sinbukan nga nilang kumpletuhin. at ito na nga ang akin. Take note, dapat ang mga nakalista ay mga bagay na gustong gawin at ndi ung mga gustong magkaron.:)

Here's my first attempt to my 101 Things to do in my life.

TEACHER'S TALE: My Letter to my 12 Year Old Self

Katatapos ko lang magcheck ng papel ng mga estudyante ko ngaun gabe. Isa sa mga pinagaw ko sa kanila ay isang sulat para sa kanilang 12 year old self at 45 year old self. Nasiyahan ako sa karamihan sa mga nabasa ko. Madame akong agad na nalaman sa kanila dahil sa isang activity na yun. Dun ko naisip na bakit ba ndi ko ginawa ung activity na yun. At kung gagawin ko man eh anu kaya ang maisusulat ko. Kaya nga ba at eto ako para isulat na ang assignment ko for the day, para sa susunod na ipagaw ko ito sa klase ko eh maipapaliwanag ko na ito ng mas malalim dahil naranasan ko din ang kinakalilangan nilang gawin.


                             
                        

 Letter to my 12 year old self

Dearest Jing,

Sa panahon na mababasa mo ang liham na ito ay maaring pagraduate ka na ng grade school, at malamang ay iniisip mo kung star section ka pa ba next year kasi hanggang ngayon ay pinagdududahan mo pa rin ang galing at talino mo. Sino ba naman kasing ndi manliliit sa mga grado ng kaklase mo eh noh? Pero wag kang mag alala ang bawat grado na makukuha mo sa pag aaral ay ikakaproud mo naman. Marame kang magiging bagsak sa mga subjects at teacher na mahirap pero ganun pa man matututo kang magsikap sa pag aaral. Darating ang panahon na habang nag-aaral ka ng MAPEH eh nakakatulog ka na kasi ang nirereview mo eh tungkol sa drugs. Nakakaantok un dapat kasi wala nang written exam ang PE. Pero dahil sa mabuti ka namang estudyante nuon eh ginagawa mo ang lahat ng dapat mong gawin para pumasa. Magkakaline of 7 ka kay Ms. Suarez, pero kahit ganun eh marame ka namang matutunan sa kanya, maliban sa mga biomes na napanood mo sa required film shows nya eh matututo ka tungkol sa sarili mong pagkatao. Hindi rin hihinto ang pagiging magkakilala nyo sa highschool kasi magiging colleague mo siya pagdating ng pagiging teacher mo sa CSB. Isa siya sa mga naging highlights mo sa buhay kasi sakanya mo ata naramdaman lahat ng klase ng feelings ng isang student sa teacher. TAKOT un mostly at KABA sa tuwing tatawagin ka nya. Madalas din isa siya sa nagparamdam sayong ndi ka nga matalino. Pero naging ok naman ang buhay mo nung highschool, nagawa mo pa rin ang gusto mo, naging student council ka ulit kahit na naulit ang history nang matalo ka ulit sa third year. Alam mo na na mangyayare un eh pero sumige ka pa din. Popular kaya ung kalaban mo nun, si Cha.:) Pero kahit ganun pa man naging masaya pa din naman ang 4th year kasi Sangguniang MAg aaral ka pa rin naman, ikaw pa nga ang naging PRO? tama ba? ikaw ang nagsasalita tuwing angelus at morning prayer. Ok naman na tayo dun diba?:)

Maliban sa pagaaral, eh ndi naten matatanggi na naheart broken tayo nun, sa mga maling tao. Hanggang ngaun naiisip ko pa sila at natutuwa naman akong naging parte sila ng buhay naten. Sabihin mang mali, eh ganun na eh, madali kasi tayo magpaimpluewensya nuon, hanggang ngaun naman diba? Pero marame din tayong natutunan noon. Dapat pala ndi nahihiya sa nararamdaman. Dapat pinapakita. KAso ang naging hadlang naman nun eh ung insecurities naten, dahil sa pagiisp na pangit nga tayo. Nabansagan pa tayong tibo dahil lang naman sa wavy naten na buhok na di naten alam panu imanage. Pero ok na din un mga pampakilig ng buhay. Mga break up na masakit sa heart pero dahil nuon pa man magaling tayo magpretend, di nila napansin un.Di nila alam na nasasaktan na pala tayo, na lalo palang lumiliit ang tingin naten sa sarili naten dahil sa mga ginawa nila. Alam mo un kasi ndi pa uso ang blog eh nasulat na naten un eh diba?

Andame na nangyare pati sa college at sa work. May mga insecurities ka man ay nalabanan mo naman ung mga un. Halos isang dekada na bago ko to nasulat sayo. Nawalan pa ng internet connection kaya ung una kong nasulat eh nabura lahat. Makakaranas ka ng maraming pagsubok sa buhay pero wala pa un sa mga naranasan ng ibang tao, lahat halos eh kinaya mo naman. Makakahanap ka din ng mga tunay na kaibigan mo at mahahanap mo din ang lugar mo sa mundo. Makikita mo ang isang bagay na ndi mo man inisip na magiging ikaw eh magiging ikaw nga at malaking kasiyahan talga ang naibibigay nito sa iyo.

Ipagpatuloy mo ang lahat ng ginagawa mo para sa sarili, sa pamilya, kaibigan at mahal sa buhay kasi dito ka tunay na nagiging masaya. Ndi man palaging nasusuklian eh atleast nakikita mo ang halaga mo sa mundo. Ipagpatuloy mo din ang pagkakawanggawa, madalas na mahihinto ka pero kelangan mong mahanap ang tunay na inspirasyon para mapagpatuloy un.

May makikilala kang magpapakilala sayo sa tunay na ikaw. Na worth kang mahalin at tanggapin. Malalaman mo din yan sa sarili mo dahil ikaw mismo ay magiging kumportable sa kung sino ka man. MAkikita mong ndi mo na kelangan gumawa ng malalaking bagay para mapasaya sila.

Mag commit ka sa isang sport, isang instrument,hobby o anuman. Takot ka kasi sa commitment kahit nuon pa kaya wala kang naging magaling o wala kang napagstayan eh. Yan ang hirap sayom andale mong magsawa. Pero ndi ka nman natatakot na tumaya, un lang ang naging magandang epekto nun.

Anyway, dito nalang muna. Gusto kong malaman mong lahat ng naging desisyon mo sa buhay eh naging maayos din naman ang kinahinatnan. KAsi eto pa naman ako eh, ok pa.. hindi lang pala OK, MASAYA.:)

Sa iyo,

Jho 26 taon gulang

TEACHER'S TALE: Sa Ngalan ng Tubo Part 1

*Para lubusan maintindihan ang mga sinasabe ko magandang mapanuod ninyo ito.*

Part 1
Part II
Part III
Part IV

TEACHER'S TALE:Taya

Sa buhay anong kaya mong itaya? Kung ang buhay ay isang laro, anung kaya mong isugal? Maaring ang iniisip mo eh usapang pag-ibig ito. Sa totoo lang, nagkakamali ka. Hindi na usapan ng puso ito. Madame na akong nasulat tungkol dito, at sa estado ko ngaun wala pang kumukurot sa puso ko. (segway lang)

Sa totoo lang, nainspire lang talaga ako sa isang kanta ng Up Dharma Down na Taya. Pero ang tema nung kanta eh tungkol sa pagmamahal. Pero nairelate ko ito sa cause ng mga magsasaka at mangagawang bukid ng Hacienda Luisita.

Taya by Up Dharma Down

Sa ilang dekada na, tingin ko lang sila na ata ang may pinakamalaking sinugal at itinaya sa laban nila, o naten. Mula nung 1957 na kinuha ng mga Cojuangco ang lupa na totoo namang kanila ang lupa, sa pagkitil ng buhay ng ilang mga magsasaka nung masaker, at pati na ang mismong mga susunod na henerasyong magtutuloy ng nasimulan na ng mga nakatatanda sa kanila.

Para sa kapirasong lupang hinihingi nila sa mga Cojuangco Aquino ay isinugal nila ang kanilang mga buhay, pati na ang kalayaang mabuhay na walang takot na minsan isang araw ay bigla nalang may kukuha sa kanila na kikitil ng kanilang buhay. Patas na karapatan lang naman ang kanilang nais. Karapatang mabuhay na ndi nangangambang bukas ay wala na silang makakain, na ang bawat anak nila ay may oportunidad na makapag-aral sa isang maayos na paaralan, na maibigay sa pamilya ang buhay na magaang at masaya.

Araw- araw sa buhay ng bawat magsasakang nakausap ko sa Hacienda Luisita ay laging nakataya.

Pero kahit ni isang beses, ndi ko sila nakitaan na takot. Takot na magdudulot na atrasan o bawiin ang kanilang isinugal.

Salamat at handa kayong isugal ang lahat ng iyan. Hindi lang para sa inyo at sa inyong komunidad, ngunit pati sa akin na umaasang magtagumpay ang sugal na iyan.

Susugal na din ako. Kayo? Handa na ba kayong sumugal?

TEACHER'S TALE:Pagtuyo ng Luha

Ilang beses ko nang binalak magsulat tungkol sa karanasan ko sa Hacienda Luisita, pero tuwing gagawin ko eh napanghihinaan ako ng loob sa pagiisip na maaring ndi ko mabigyang hustisya ito sa blog na to.

Pero mahina man ang loob ko eh eto na nga ako at nagsusulat na. Pang-apat na balik ko na sa Hacienda Luisita nitong nakaraang linggo. Nakakagulat man, pero sa pang- apat na pagpunta ko dun eh, ndi pa rin ako tinakas ng pagluha ko. Sunday na noon eh uuwi nalang kame, pero dahil sa teacher nga ako eh hindi naman maaring wala akong sabihin sa klase ko. Dun na lumabas ang lahat ng saloobin ko.

Saloobin ukol sa pagiging guro kong napanghihinaan din ng loob, sa mga attitude ng estudyante ko, ako bilang nagtitiwala sa adhikain ng mga farmers ng Hacienda Luisita, at ako bilang tao.

Sa kahit anong aspeto man natin tignan, makikita sa bawat pagpunta ko dun, sa bawat salita ng mga magsasakang nakilala ko, sa estado ng kabuhayan, edukasyon, at kalusugan ng mga tao dun, masasabe natin agad, walang patumpik tumpik, na "OO, may mali nga talaga!" At malungkot man sabihin na ang MALI na ito ay nakakaapekto sa ilang libong tao. Hindi namimili ang MALI na ito ng edad, kasarian, kulay, katawan, atbp. Basta taga Hacienda Luisita ka eh kasama ka sa epektong dala ng MALI na ito. HIndi ako eksperto sa pagexplain ng nangyare sa kanila, pero tiyak kong naiintinidhan ko ito ng malinaw na malinaw. Sa kahit na ano pang anggulo tignan, ndi kelanman naging tama ang mang abuso, mangamkam, at pumatay ng tao, literal man o ndi.

Lupa lang naman ang sigaw ng bawat isang nakausap ko sa Hacienda. Ndi nila kelanman binanggit saken na gusto nila ng magarbong bahay, mamahaling sasakyan, o kung anu pa mang luho sa mundo. Napaka basic lang naman talaga ng gusto nila, makapagsaka ng sarili nilang lupa, kalayaang makapagtanim, umani, kumain, at kumita sa tamang paraan. Paraang alam nila.. at un ay ang pagsasaka.

Isa sa mga ndi nagfafail na magpababa ng luha ko ay ang mga batang naisasakripisyo ang kanilang pag-aaral, dahil sa ganid ng iilang matataas na tao. Nitong weekend nakilala ko si MJ, andun kasi siya nakatambay sa bahay ni Tatay Jerry. Nagpapractice siyang magbasa, eh dahil sa teacher ako, ginuide ko siya sa pagbabasa. Magaling na siya magbasa, at ang binasa nya nun ay isang bukas na liham tungkol sa kaso ng mga mangagawang bukid sa Hacienda Luisita. Binasa nya ito buong buo, pero nung tanungin ko siya, ndi niya alam kung saan ang Hacienda at kung sino ang sinasabe sa binasa nya. Ni hindi nya alam na siya mismo ang dahilan kung bakit may sulat na ganun. Para sa kanya ang bukas na liham na un. Pero dahil sa maling sistema ng pagpapalakad sa hacienda, wala siyang kamalay malay na para saknya pala ang laban na iyon.

Hindi pa tapos ang laban. Laban ndi lamang sa lupa. Laban para sa kinabukasan na di lang iilan sa mga tao ng Hacienda Luisita pero para sa buong sambayanan. Madalas akong magtaka kung anong maari kong iambag sa laban na ito. Wla naman akong talentong tulad sa mga manunulat, manunula, mga artist na may maitutulong sa laranagan ng arts. Di rin ako aktibista at ndi ko din ata kakayanin ang buhay nila dahil napakahirap. Saan nga ba ako tutulong? Paano?

Sa matagal na panahon, ndi ko nakita na ang sagot pala sa tanong ko ay nasa harapan ko na, limang taon na ang nakalipas. At ito ay ang pagiging guro ko. Isa akong guro na may kakayahang dalhin sa loob ng klase ang mga nalalaman ko. Kakayahang imulat ang mga kabataan sa totoong laban ng mga tao. At ito ang gagawin ko.

Kasama ng pagkilos ay ang paniniwala kong kailanman ay hinding hindi mauubos ang luha ko para sa kanila.