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Wednesday, June 5, 2013

MEMOIRS OF A BLOGGER: Metamorphosis

Looking back when I started this blog, I realized that I have encapsulated my progress as a person. I started this blog because a friend of mine, KC Co, influenced me to do so. I remembered during those times in college I didn’t have an internet connection so the only chance I could blog was during our breaks in school. I would often blog only about my “non-existent’ love life. It was all about those personal dramas and angst I had during my teenager years. It was in 2005 that I was introduced to blogging. The birth of magicspaceship.blogspot.com.

2005:16 entries

During those times I didn’t have internet connection I would often write down my thoughts on paper and edit it in the computer whenever I get the chance to go online. I had 16 entries during that year. I wrote about anything under the sun that I felt was worth writing. Aside from love life, I also wrote about books I have read, hobbies I do, and friendships I had. I only had one constant reader in my blog and that was the same person who got me into blogging.
Though I didn’t get too much audience in my blog, it really didn’t affect me as much because I treated it as my online diary. When I was a little kid I had a lot of diaries/journal so it wasn’t really new to me. Online blogging only taught me to sensor what I say, not to disclose too much, and to write in a more creative way. (I think.)

2006:1 entry

Sadly, year 2006 only got 1 entry into my blog site. It was entitled Spur of the Moment. I feel this is one of the most emotional blog entries I have written. Would you have guessed? It has something to do with my love life. Again, my non-existent love life.

2007: 18 entries

Year 2007 marked my “young professional” blog entries. It was during this time that I had a lot of uncertainties in terms of my career, or should I say, work at that time. I couldn’t consider it as a career yet, as I wasn’t really sure what career I wanted to take. To put into context, I was working as a part time teacher and a congress secretariat for a Chastity conference. It was also during this period that I shared other blogs or articles I’ve read. The greatest lesson I got from this year was that there are a lot of different types of people in the corporate world. People who would appreciate what you do, sees your potential while there are people who would underestimate your capacities, treat you as lowly subordinates and judged you by the school you went to. I am glad I had that experience cause from that day forward I knew who I will never be if I became of higher position.
But of course, this year would not be complete without my love entries. Although, unfortunately, it was about bitter love, being taken for granted, being the other woman, and not being committed on.

2008: 3 entries

This year I only had 3 entries. Two of it was reminiscing about my college days and one entry was my first attempt to write a review on a site. I can’t really remember so much about this year so let’s just move on to 2009.
2009: 19 entries

I couldn’t really summarize this year for my blog site. Reading them again now, makes me think I was really looking for something deeper during this year. Most of my blogs were about sadness. I couldn’t really remember why. I was in a long term relationship during this year and was already teaching. What I truly realized in this year was that I learned my passion, and that is TEACHING. My blog post about teaching was always filled with joy and inspiration. I was really genuinely happy doing it and I am grateful that I have taught for 7 years.
2010: 9 entries

This year was about happiness. The previous year it felt like I was searching, this year re-reading my blog gave me a sense of freedom. Freedom to search and explore myself more and I did not fail. It was a very memorable year, a year I learned more about myself, what matters to me, what I enjoy doing and what kept me limited. It was a year of freedom.
Also, 2009 showed me my passion, while 2010 gave me the opportunity to do my passion. This was the year I felt I was doing a good job as a teacher. I realized I did not need to pretend and please my students because I was perfectly fine as I was.
The word that best describes my 2010 is: Strength.

2011: 20 entries

As 2010 gave me freedom, 2011 was its actualization. I did so much during this year and I had time to write about it. It was the year I wrote about travels, about my teaching career, and about the things I wanted to do in my life.
This was the year I created my 101 Things to do in Life.
I wanted to become a travel blogger, but I didn’t know where and how to start, I tried, but I think I failed… miserably. So I stopped it. But it was also this year that I wrote about something I truly cared about and that is the Struggle for Land of the Hacienda Luisita farmers. I was a consular and diplomatic affairs graduate but I didn’t really know their cause. It was during this year I learned about them, knew them and tried to fight for them.
I also wanted to become a children’s storybook writer. So I had my first story written in my blog. I never had the chance to actually write and illustrate it but was able to perform it in an outreach we did for my birthday.

2012: 19 entries

This year was a year of uncertainty. It was during this year that I was on the verge of being unemployed because I didn’t finish my masters degree. A year that would, in my belief, end my passion for teaching. On a lighter side, my blog entries were also about different things or principles that mattered to me about individuality, insecurities, friendship, relationships, and just some random things.

June 2013 (Present):6 entries

Most of my entries at present are about friendship. It is at this year that I have learned a hard lesson about friendship. It was really painful but I think it has done me more good than bad. I learned I don’t need to have a lot of friends, just true ones. I learned to define who my unreal friends are and they are those who are: competitive, cannot be genuinely happy about me and what happens in my life, and pretentious people. For a long time, maybe even up to now, I am hurt by what I realized and what was done to me. Though this hurt is still with me I am on my way to forgive and forget the pain. I have learned to be careful and not to attach myself to much on people.
So, what’s next for me and magicspaceship?

This year, a lot of things will change. Actually, they are already changing. Though they are changing I am welcoming every bit of it. I am actually excited on becoming a wife, a first time mom, and an online-work-at-home professional (?)

My blog has been the witness of my growth. From a naive college student, to a young professional, a teacher and finally to a forever career of being a wife and mother. So from now on the spaceship has landed to motherhood and wife-hood. 

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